Challenge accepted:

*BIG SIGH*

You know, it really really reallllly rubs me the wrong way when people tell me I can't do something ("can't" as in "unable").

I have had many people tell me "Don't you think [insert occupation here] would be so much easier than becoming a firefighter? I mean, that's just so hard!" Ummmm... Yeah, it's tough, but if it was easy everyone would be doing it! 

 Or "Have you ever considered [insert occupation here]?" No. I have never, ever, ever (Taylor Swift status, right here) considered ANY other career. Like, ever.

It's not about doing what's easy, it's about doing what I love. When I talk about the calls I've run on, I feel alive inside. I feel bright and fiery. I can't see my own face, but I'm pretty sure my eyes light up and my cheeks flush. The whole shebang. 

I firmly believe that I was not put on this earth to be ordinary. I am not cut from a cookie cutter. I am not one of the masses. Despite what Tyler Durden says, I am a gosh darn unique snowflake!!!

So go ahead. 

Tell me I can't do it. 

Suggest other careers. 

Doubt my dedication. 

Don't believe in me. 

I dare you.

I like a challenge.

Chivalry: Dead or Alive?

Most of you are probably aware that I am pursuing the career path of firefighter paramedic. And as some of you are aware, this is somewhat of a male dominated field, though over the past few decades, it is becoming somewhat more common to see a female firefighter right there with the boys, especially in places like San Diego City.

I had an experience in a restaurant tonight that got my mental wheels turning. I was standing in the lobby of a crowded restaurant, waiting for my mom so we could leave. An older gentleman saw me standing and stood up, offering me his seat. I declined, saying I was leaving shortly but thanked him for his kindness. I made a remark on the "Good Book" that chivalry is not entirely dead, it's just dead among people my own age.

Definition: Chivalry - 

1.	the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, esp courage, honor, justice, and a readiness to help the weak
2.	courteous behavior, esp towards women
3.	the medieval system and principles of knighthood
4.	knights, noblemen, etc, collectively

One of my former EMT partners sent me the link to an article that has a short summary of a female Air Force Lieutenant who was trying to get her husband covered by her health insurance. This was in 1971 and apparently for a man to claim his wife as a dependent, he need only apply. Though for a woman to claim her husband, she must provide proof that her husband is dependent for at least half of his support. The Lieutenants husband was not, thus he was denied coverage.

This got me to thinking...

We as women have fought for equality. We wanted to run with the Good Ol' Boys. Now that we have some equality, it seems as though we feel as if chivalry is lacking, missing, or dead!

Now, the rest of this blog gets very specific as to job type, so it probably doesn't apply to all areas...


I feel that those involved in public service (military, police, fire/EMS) are held to a higher standard as far as a code of conduct. So within those jobs, are we held to a certain level of equality that negates chivalry, in the most common sense of the word? Or are chivalry and a general respect for others a similar thing? (EG holding doors open, offering up a seat, carrying things, holding an elevator door, etc) Does being chivalrous imply that the offering party is stronger or more capable than the receiving party?

Hmmmm...

If I'm at work, I don't want special treatment. I may be a female, but I can do my job just as good as any man and maybe better than most. I am one of the guys. Help carrying the equipment down the stairs? No thanks, I'm good. (though you can totally carry Mr What's-his-name who weighs 500 pounds and is shaped like the Pillsbury Dough Boy down those 4 flights of stairs while I carry the monitor and drug box. Thanks!) (I'm not stupid, after all... Work smarter, not harder)

HOWEVER. Outside of work, hold that gosh darn door open! Offer me your seat. Walk me to my car. Offer me your coat. Open my car door. Treat me like a lady. ESPECIALLY if you're taking me on a date! Or if you're dating me! Just because you've won my heart doesn't mean I still don't enjoy it when you open doors for me. :-)

Moral of the story, stay on the safe side and be respectful. Not just to women, but to everyone around you. Hold a door, offer your chair, help carry something.

Moment of Weakness:

A friend of mine gave me her dads number and had me call him to talk about "Firefighter stuff". I finally connected with him today and he answered some of my questions and gave me a few tips and some ideas on where to go next.

One of his suggestions was that I call a friend of his, who is a female Firefighter Paramedic, to get an idea of what to expect and to hear about what she went through and how it was for her. I called the number he gave me for the station and spoke to a man who was a little short with me and said that he couldn't give me her information because he didn't know me. So I called my friends dad and asked him to put in a call for me. He did and I now have the correct contact info.

However, when I hung up the phone, I just felt like crying. All my doubt started flooding to the surface. Would I be strong enough physically, emotionally, mentally? Could I even do this? And I gave in to them. I let myself cry. I let my doubts circle me and taunt me. I sat and sulked for about 10 minutes. Then, I noticed that James was online. I sent him an instant message basically saying that I didn't think I could do this. He spent the next hour or so pulling me out of my funk and back up to the surface. The gist of the conversation was that I have the ability to do anything, I just need the mentality. It's all in my head. And, as James pointed out, I didn't choose to do this because I thought it would be easy. I've known all along that this will be a long, difficult journey.

I texted a fellow EMT and asked him if he ever had doubts about his abilities. He said "Why doubt yourself? If you ever think you can't, just know there is always some sort of training to make it so you can. It's going to be hard. It's going to be demanding. But what's a little work to get what you want? This is the rest of your life we're talking about." Well, I cleaned it up a bit and made it "flow" better, but that's essentially what he said.

It got me thinking. Sure, I didn't know I wanted to do this until about 8 months ago, but that doesn't mean I don't know what I want to do now. I began to think about my build, physically. I am not a dainty flower. I am taller and stronger than most women. With some conditioning, I can do this job and I can do it well. My personality will fit perfectly with this job. I was made to do this.

I CAN do this. I can.

I need to get my head in the game.

I need to get my body in the game, too.

And right now, I need to go get ready to crash my first fire class!