Chivalry: Dead or Alive?

Most of you are probably aware that I am pursuing the career path of firefighter paramedic. And as some of you are aware, this is somewhat of a male dominated field, though over the past few decades, it is becoming somewhat more common to see a female firefighter right there with the boys, especially in places like San Diego City.

I had an experience in a restaurant tonight that got my mental wheels turning. I was standing in the lobby of a crowded restaurant, waiting for my mom so we could leave. An older gentleman saw me standing and stood up, offering me his seat. I declined, saying I was leaving shortly but thanked him for his kindness. I made a remark on the "Good Book" that chivalry is not entirely dead, it's just dead among people my own age.

Definition: Chivalry - 

1.	the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, esp courage, honor, justice, and a readiness to help the weak
2.	courteous behavior, esp towards women
3.	the medieval system and principles of knighthood
4.	knights, noblemen, etc, collectively

One of my former EMT partners sent me the link to an article that has a short summary of a female Air Force Lieutenant who was trying to get her husband covered by her health insurance. This was in 1971 and apparently for a man to claim his wife as a dependent, he need only apply. Though for a woman to claim her husband, she must provide proof that her husband is dependent for at least half of his support. The Lieutenants husband was not, thus he was denied coverage.

This got me to thinking...

We as women have fought for equality. We wanted to run with the Good Ol' Boys. Now that we have some equality, it seems as though we feel as if chivalry is lacking, missing, or dead!

Now, the rest of this blog gets very specific as to job type, so it probably doesn't apply to all areas...


I feel that those involved in public service (military, police, fire/EMS) are held to a higher standard as far as a code of conduct. So within those jobs, are we held to a certain level of equality that negates chivalry, in the most common sense of the word? Or are chivalry and a general respect for others a similar thing? (EG holding doors open, offering up a seat, carrying things, holding an elevator door, etc) Does being chivalrous imply that the offering party is stronger or more capable than the receiving party?

Hmmmm...

If I'm at work, I don't want special treatment. I may be a female, but I can do my job just as good as any man and maybe better than most. I am one of the guys. Help carrying the equipment down the stairs? No thanks, I'm good. (though you can totally carry Mr What's-his-name who weighs 500 pounds and is shaped like the Pillsbury Dough Boy down those 4 flights of stairs while I carry the monitor and drug box. Thanks!) (I'm not stupid, after all... Work smarter, not harder)

HOWEVER. Outside of work, hold that gosh darn door open! Offer me your seat. Walk me to my car. Offer me your coat. Open my car door. Treat me like a lady. ESPECIALLY if you're taking me on a date! Or if you're dating me! Just because you've won my heart doesn't mean I still don't enjoy it when you open doors for me. :-)

Moral of the story, stay on the safe side and be respectful. Not just to women, but to everyone around you. Hold a door, offer your chair, help carry something.